Love and Roast Chicken

For the Love & Roast Chicken

Adapted by Tara Benhudjiriras

Songs/Lyrics composed by P. C. Sroka

From "Love And Roast Chicken A Trickster Tale From the Andes Mountains,"

by Barbara Knutson

Songs

Peru

I Gotta Pee

Tio Antonio’s Lament

Love and Roast Chicken

Important Note - Lyrics have changed slightly

(in "I Gotta Pee" and "Tio Antonio's Lament")

since these recordings were made.

Most of the changes are related to pronouns.

Please take note and study.

“Peru”

Peru,

Way up high in the Andes,

Where the sweetgrass is plentiful,

Peru.

Peru,

Muy alto en los Andes,

Donde hay hierba dulce,

Peru.

From the Amazon to Machu Pichu,

So many species are found,

Swim in a river with Pink Dolphins,

Or visit Vicuñas on higher ground,

You’ll also find gullible foxes,

And trickster guinea pigs as well,

Sit back relax and enjoy the show,

The story we’re about to tell.

Peru,

Way up high in the Andes,

Where the sweetgrass is plentiful,

Peru.

Peru,

Muy alto en los Andes,

Donde hay hierba dulce,

Peru,

Peru.

“I Gotta Pee”

Cuy: I gotta pee, I gotta pee, I gotta pee,

I gotta pee, I gotta pee, I gotta pee,

Please take this rock from me!

I gotta pee, I gotta pee, I gotta pee,

The world will cease to be,

All: If you don’t help,

the sky will fall!

Surely the end to us all!

They gotta pee, they gotta pee, they gotta pee,

Please take this rock we plea!

What is our destiny?

“Tio Antonio’s Lament”

Why should you believe this liar,

Telling us there will be fire,

After what they did before?

But the possibility,

Threatens our humanity,

We can’t really know for sure,

If what they say actually comes true,

Solo: What shall I do?

Everyone: What shall you do?

Guinea pig move to the side,

Solo: I will now jump in and hide!

“Love and Roast Chicken”

Love and roast chicken,

Tio Antonio missed out today,

Love and roast chicken,

Cuy, that trickster, again got away

Love and roast chicken,

From Peru to the SF Bay,

Love and roast chicken,

That is the end of our play.

FOR LOVE & ROAST CHICKEN

SCENE 1 Huge Rock/Sweetgrass

(Enter Narrators, they take their seats)

Narrator 1: Welcome, Welcome to our first and ever Cleveland third grade play!

Narrator 2: This story takes place in Peru, high up in the Andes Mountains, where the

sweetgrass is plentiful. (pointing at Peru on the globe)

SONG - "Peru"

Narrator 3: Cuy, the Guinea Pig, had been climbing up and down in search of his next

meal.

(SUN APPEARS)

Cuy: ohhhh, sweetgrass!! Just in time for lunchtime (patting his belly).

(Cuy getting ready to take his first bite)

Narrator 4: As Cuy was going to take his first bite, he heard a whistling that sounded

very familiar.

(Cuy looks up alert, looking left then right)

Cuy: (nervously) Ay No, that sounds like Tío Antonio! Must hide, must hide!

Narrator 1: Tío Antonio was a Fox who loooved eating chicken, but hadn’t eaten in a

while so he was up for the next best thing- guinea pig.

Narrator 2: Cuy wasn’t fast enough to escape or hide, but noticed a large rock and had

to think quickly!

(Cuy goes over to the rock and position himself so it looks like he is holding the rock up)

Narrator 3: Cuy squeezed under the rock and pressed up with his arms.

(Enters Tio Antonio as he walks up to Cuy)

Tío Antonio: (in a snarling voice) Aha! Dinner!

(Tio Antonio going to grab Cuy)

Cuy: ¡Espera, espera! Wait! Haven’t you heard? The sky is FALLING!!

Tío Antonio: (growling) Nonsense! (looks up at the sky) It looks the same as always!

Cuy: (desperate) That’s because I’m holding it up with this rock. I’ve been here since

morning and I need to go pee. (Doing a little pee pee dance) Please, will you hold the

rock just for a minute?

SONG - "I Gotta Pee"

(Tio Antonio looks up at the sky and then back at Cuy)

Narrator 4: Tío Antonio looked up at the sky and thought it’d be a shame if the sky fell

today.

Tío Antonio: Okay, pero rápido! Make it quick!

(Tio Antonio ‘lifts’ the rock so that Cuy can wiggle out. Cuy ‘lifts’ the rock so Tio Antonio

could squeeze into the same position Cuy had been- lifting the rock.

Narrator 1: Tío Antonio crouched under the rock and pushed with his front legs.

Cuy: (warning) Don’t let go, or we will all be squished.

(Cuy walks of stage)

Narrator 2: Cuy disappeared behind some bushes and went off looking for more food.

(THE MOON slowly walks on stage- THE SUN slowly walks of stage)

Narrator 3:Tío Antonio waited and waited. By sunset, his arms were no longer able to

hold the rock up.

Tío Antonio: I have to let go, even if the sky falls!

(Tio Antonio drops his hands quickly from holding up the rock and scrambles to duck

onto the floor. He is in an earthquake position- hands over head body tucked in tight

over knees)

(a beat: 5 seconds)

(Tio Antonio slowly looks up and around and gets up to his feet)

Narrator 4: But as we all could guess, nothing happened. The rock stayed put and the

sky stayed in the sky.

Tío Antonio: (Angrily shaking his fists) I’ll get that guinea pig!! (Tio Antonio walks off.)

Narrator 1: Tío Antonio bounded down the trail in search of Cuy. (Narrators walk off.

SCENE 2: Den /Sweetgrass

(Enter Narrators, they take their seats)

(The Rock is now turned into a Den with rocks covering the entrance)

(Enters Cuy walking into the field of sweetgrass)

Narrator 1: Cuy was enjoying a mouthful of sweetgrass when he saw Tío Antonio

coming towards him.

(Enters Tio Antonio walking angrily towards Cuy)

(Cuy starts to dig out the small rocks covering the Den)

Narrator 2: Cuy had to think fast. He wasn’t fast enough to escape or hide. So, he

began digging into the side of the hill.

Tío Antonio: Aha! I’ve got you this time! (grabbing onto Cuy’s leg)

Cuy: (afraid) Amigo mio! Don’t you know the world is ending tonight in a rain of fire?

Help me dig a safe den!

Tío Antonio: (declarative) I’m not going to believe you this time!

Cuy: (shrugging his shoulders) Ok, esta bien, don’t blame me when your whiskers are

on fire.

Narrator 3: Tío Antonio didn’t want to be fooled again by Cuy, but he also didn’t want to

go up in flames tonight. So, he had to make a decision.

SONG - "Tio Antonio's Lament"

(Tio Antonio pushes Cuy aside and crawls into the Den)

Narrator 4: Tío Antonio shoved Cuy aside and crawled into the dug-out hole.

Tío Antonio: Well then, this den is mine now, compadre. Go dig your own!

Cuy: (sighing) Está bien! I’ll even pile some rocks in front of the door to keep you safe

from the sparks. When the world ends, remember I was your last friend.

(Cuy piles on the small rocks till the Den opening is covered)

Narrator 1: Tío Antonio huddled at the back of the den and waited.

Narrator 2: And waited.

Narrator 3: He started to think about ALL the things he would miss when the world

ended.

Narrator 4: No more dancing by moonlight with his fellow compadres.

Narrator 1: No more chicken dinners from the farmer’s flock. And he loooved his

chicken dinners.

Narrator 2: But he also thought… This could just be another one of Cuy’s tricks.

Narrator 3: So, Tío Antonio peered through the rocks covering the entrance.

(Tio Antonio pushing a small rock off of the pile so that he could have a peek)

Tío Antonio: (frightened) Fuego! So, I guess it’s true.

Narrator 4: Flames crackled and smoked on the other side.

Tío Antonio: (wondering- with a hint of sadness- loud enough for the audience to hear)

I wonder who else survived.

(SUN APPEARS- MOON goes off stage)

Narrator 1: When morning came at last, the flames were gone.

Narrator 2: Tío Antonio pushed away the rocks to see what the end of the world looked

like.

(Tio Antonio pushing the rocks out of the way. Putting one hand up to shield away the

bright sunlight)

Narrator 3: The sun was shining, and everything looked the same.

Narrator 4: However, in front of the den lay a pile of ashes from Cuy’s fire.

(Tio Antonio looks around and then looks down at the pile of ashes from Cuy’s fire and

kicks it)

Tío Antonio: (Furious and howling) Cuy!!! Next time, I’ll eat you on the spot!

(Tio Antonio walks off stage)

(Narrators walk off stage)

SCENE 3: Alfalfa field

(Enter Narrators, they take their seats)

Narrator 1: Cuy has been very cunning and clever so far.

Narrator 2: And had a plan up his sleeves.

(Enters Cuy with a poncho wrapping a hat- looks like a bundle)

Cuy: I’m going where there’s plenty of food and no foxes!

Narrator 3: He was going to disguise himself as a farm worker.

(Cuy unfolds the bundle revealing a poncho and a hat. He puts on the poncho and the

hat)

Narrator 4: So he put on a poncho and hat and went down the mountain to knock on

the farmer’s door.

(Enters the farmer with a rake in hand, tending to his alfalfa field)

(Cuy walks up to the farmer)

(Farmer stops what he is doing and looks at Cuy)

(Enters Florinda working on the other end of the alfalfa field)

Cuy: Buenos días, Señor.

Farmer: Buenos dias

Cuy: Need any help with the Alfalfa?

(Farmer thought while he bent down and pulled some weeds from the alfalfa field)

Narrator 1: Farmer was taken aback at how small the little farm worker was, but he did

need help.

Farmer: Bueno, Can you start right away?

(Farmer slowly stands up wiping his hands on his pants)

Cuy: Sí, please lead the way.

(Farmer and Cuy walk through the field till they reach Florinda)

Farmer: This is my daughter Florinda, she will be working with you.

(Florinda wipes her hand on her dress and offers it to Cuy to shake)

Florinda: Encantada de conocerte.

(Cuy shakes Florinda’s hand)

Cuy: Nice to meet you as well!

Farmer: You two will make sure that the alfalfas are able to grow plentiful and healthy.

Florinda: Yes Papá. We will make sure to weed and hoe and water the fields.

Cuy: Señor, you can count on us.

Farmer: Very well, Florinda you show Cuy what needs to be done.

(Farmer walks off stage)

Florinda: Sí, Papá.

(Florinda and Cuy work to care for the alfalfa, occasionally bending down to pull out

weeds)

Narrator 2: So, Florinda and Cuy worked hard and fast every day.

(Florinda & Cuy goes off stage)

(MOON APPEARS- SUN goes off stage)

(Cuy creeps slowly hunched back onto the stage. Cuy creeps towards the alfalfa field)

Narrator 3: But, when night fell, Cuy feasted on fresh alfalfa.

Cuy: I’m never going to leave! This is paradise! An All-You-Can-Eat buffet of alfalfas.

Plus no fox in sight! (Opening his arms out in front of the Alfalfa field)

(Cuy takes his time happily ‘eating’ the alfalfa) (A beat- 5 seconds) (Cuy goes off stage)

(SUN APPEARS- MOON goes off stage)

(Enters the Farmer and Florinda behind him)

Narrator 4: By the end of the third day, the farmer noticed that something was wrong.

(Farmer facing Florinda)

Farmer: (worried) Florinda, I think someone is stealing our alfalfas. What do you think?

(Florinda looking down at the Alfalfa)

Florinda: (frowning) I noticed this morning as well, there was a lot more alfalfa missing.

Farmer: But who could it be? And how can we catch them?

Florinda: (thinking) Hmmm.. maybe we can make something that looks like someone

guarding the field?

Farmer: Yes, let’s try.

(Enters Sticky Gum Doll)

Narrator 1: The farmer and his daughter shaped a little person out of clay and covered

it with sticky sap from the eucalyptus tree.

(Florinda & Farmer pretending to put sap on Sticky Gum Doll using a brush and a pot of sap)

Narrator 2: The farmer and his daughter went back out to the field with their little doll.

(Florinda & Farmer brings Sticky Gum Doll to the Alfalfa field)

Florinda: Let’s put it here.

Farmer: Careful mi hija, don’t get the sap on you.

Florinda: I’m being careful Papá.

(Farmer and Florinda set the Doll down and Florinda applies extra sap with the brush)

Narrator 3: They propped the doll in the field and went back to the house to get ready

for bed.

(Florinda & Farmer walk back off stage)

(MOON APPEARS- SUN goes off stage)

(Cuy creeping back onto the stage and standing near the alfalfa field and inspecting it)

Narrator 4: In the middle of the night, Cuy crept out for a little midnight snack.

Cuy: (rubbing his belly & facing the audience) Ah what a wonderful night for a little

alfalfa snacky-snack.

(Cuy turns his head and sees the Sticky Gum Doll)

Narrator 1: In the moonlight, he sees that someone has gotten to the field before him.

Cuy: (waving) Buenos noches! Are you a friend of Florinda’s?

(A beat- 5 seconds later)

(Cuy walking closer to the Sticky Gum Doll until he is within arms length)

Cuy: I said, hello! (waving his hands)

Narrator 2: He reaches out to shake her hand, but his paw gets stuck.

(Cuy reaches out to shake the Doll’s hand but gets stuck)

Cuy: (winking) Oho, so you want to hold hands?

Narrator 3: He patted her on the shoulder with his other paw, and that too also got

stuck.

(Cuy reaches with his other hand to give the Doll a pat on the shoulder. Now both paws

are stuck on the Sticky Gum Doll and Cuy is trying to pull away but can’t)

Cuy: (getting frustrated) Caramba! Let go! If you don’t let go, I’ll kick you!

(Cuy is struggling to free his hands)

Narrator 4: You all can guess what happens next.

(Cuy ‘kicks’ the Doll & gets his right foot stuck, tries to ‘kick’ with his left foot and gets

that one stuck as well)

Cuy: How rude!! Let go, or I’ll hit you with my head!”

(Cuy ‘headbutts’ the Doll and gets stuck)

Narrator 1: You would think he’d get it by now, but no, he got his head stuck too.

(Cuy is now stuck to the Doll)

Cuy: (Frustrated-shouting) LET ME GO! LET ME GO!

Narrator 2: He shouted so loud that it woke the farmer and his daughter up.

(Enters Farmer and Florinda)

(Farmer and Florinda run into the field)

(Farmer and Florinda are facing Cuy shaking their head and pointing fingers at him)

Farmer: ¡Qué tramposo! What a rascal! You’re not a farmworker, you’re a guinea pig!

Florinda: And you’ve been eating all of our alfalfa!

Farmer: (looking at Florinda) What should we do with this little thief?

Florinda: hmmm…I know Papá! How about my favorite dish?

Farmer & Florinda: (in unison) Roasted guinea pig con patatas asadas!!

Florinda: (licking lips and rubbing belly) mmm.. I can’t wait for dinner tomorrow!

Narrator 3: Poor unlucky Cuy, it looks like he’s met his end.

Narrator 4: The farmer and his daughter pull Cuy from the Sticky Gum Doll and tie him

up to the eucalyptus tree and go back to bed.

(Farmer & Florinda pulls Cuy off of Sticky Gum Doll)

(Cuy takes a seat on the chair next to the tree & Farmer & Florinda ties him to the

eucalyptus tree with the rope)

(Farmer & Florida takes Sticky Gum Doll and walks off stage)

Cuy: (sighs, arms folded) This night can’t get any worse!

Narrator 1: But it can, and it did!

(Narrators walk off stage)

SCENE 4: Farm: Eucalyptus Tree

(Enter Narrators, they take their seats)

(Enters Tio Antonio- slyly walking towards Cuy)

Tío Antonio: Well, well, well. Look what we have here. Just my luck! A little midnight

snack (smacks and licks lips).

Narrator 1: Cuy was terrified. It looked like the end!

Narrator 2: He knew he’d have to think on his feet.

Cuy: Oh hey, amigo.

Tío Antonio: Don’t you Amigo me, you little tramposo! Tonight, I am going to feast.

(Tio Antonio licks his lips and raises his paws.)

Cuy: (resigned) Go ahead and eat me. You’d be doing me a favor…

Narrator 3: This made Tio Antiono very suspicious.

Tio Antonio: Why? And since when do you dress like a farmer?

(Walking around Cuy and looking him up and down)

Cuy: It was a brilliant plan. I disguised myself as a farm worker and got hired so I could

steal the alfalfa. But alas!

(Cuy puts a paw over his heart)

Cuy: Do you know the farmer’s daughter, Florinda?

Tío Antonio: Yes, she’s very hardworking, I know of her.

Cuy: She fell head over heels for me.. But the trouble is, she eats chicken. Every.

Single. Day. Can you even imagine?

Narrator 4: This sounded like a dream come true for Tío Antonio.

Tío Antonio: What’s the problem?

Cuy: I’m a vegetarian!!

Tío Antonio: Probrecito (Licking his lips)

Cuy: Of course I said no, so they’ve tied me up until I promise to marry her and eat big

plates of roast chicken every day!

Tío Antonio: (Sighing) What a terrible fate. Roast chicken every day. Maybe I should take your place..

Cuy: Oh, Tio Antonio, that would never work. Unless… (rubbing his chin)

Tio Antonio: Unless what?

Cuy: Take my disguise! She has terrible eyesight, and the farmer is old and feeble.

Tio Antonio: Amigo, it will be hard. I am happy that I can do this for you.

Cuy: Bueno. I will never forget your kindness.

(Tio Antonio slowly unties Cuy and takes his place in the chair.)

(Cuy slowly ties Tio Antonio)

Narrator 1: You would think Tío Antonio would have learned his lesson by now, not to

trust Cuy.

Narrator 2: But alas, he did.

Narrator 3: Unfortunately, his stomach did most of the thinking.

Narrator 4: And so, Tío Antonio untied Cuy.

Narrator 1: And Cuy tied Tío Antonio in his place.

Narrator 2: Cuy slipped back into the field for one last feast.

(Cuy goes to leave)

Tio Antonio: Wait! The disguise?

(Cuy takes his hat off and places it on Tio Antonio’s head.)

Cuy: Of course! How could I forget? Me voy. ¡Buena suerte!

(Cuy walks off stage)

(SUN APPEARS)

Narrator 3: The next morning, the farmer and his daughter came out to untie their

dinner.

(Enters Farmer and Florinda)

(SUN APPEARS)

Tio Antonio: Ah, Florinda! My beautiful bride!

Florinda: (in shock) Papá! A fox!

Farmer: (questioning) ¿Quién eres?

Narrator 4: The farmer picked up a stick.

(Farmer picking up a nearby stick)

Tio Antonio: It is I, Cuy! I thought it over and I won’t be a vegetarian. Truly, I will eat

one of your chickens every day of the year!

Farmer: (in disbelief) ¿Cómo?

Tío Antonio: Of course Señor! I will also marry your daughter!

Farmer & Florinda: (in unison) ¿Cómo???

Narrator 1: The farmer was starting to get angry and raised his stick.

(Farmer raising his stick as if to strike)

Tío Antonio: (desperately) ¡Espera! ¡Espera! You see… (he dramatically sweeps off

the hat) I’m not really Cuy!

Florinda: (hands on hips) Of course not. Cuy is a guinea pig. You’re a fox.

Tio Antonio: Cuy told me that you tied him to the tree because he would not marry your

daughter and because of the chickens!

Florinda: (confused- shaking her head) The chickens? What about the chickens?

Tío Antonio: He told me you loved eating your chicken dinners and he would need to

eat them every day as part of the marriage.

Florinda: What?

Tío Antonio: but he’s a vegetarian! And I wanted to help him.

So, I thought maybe I marry you instead of him? and eat all the chicken dinners as well?

Farmer: (trying not to laugh) You believed a story like that? How foolish!

Florinda: (trying not to laugh) ¡Que ridículo!

Farmer: What a silly fox you are!

Florinda: Why would I ever want to marry a guinea pig?

(Both Farmer and Florinda are laughing)

Narrator 2: As the Farmer and his daughter laughed uncontrollably, Tio Antonio bit

clean through his rope and scrambled out into the field.

(Tio Antonio untying the knot and quickly leaving the scene while angrily loudly saying

his line)

Tio Antonio: (Angrily he howls) CUY!!! You will never trick me again!

Narrator 3: And to make sure that was true, he stayed away from Cuy for a long, long

time.

Narrators: (In Unison) THE END!

(Narrators walk off)

Cleveland Elementary and BVHM Unite in Song!

December 17, 2025

Songs with the Band

Burrito Sabanero

Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer

Feliz Navidad

La Bamba

Options for the Sing Along

All I Want for Christmas is You

I Want a Hippototamus

Jingle Bell Rock

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Jingle Bells

Surprise Song

Ocho Kandelikas

Last Christmas

Paletero